Power of thoughts

You are a system of beliefs, your mind is the pilot room & the third eye projects outwards the beliefs in your system making reality a flexible reflection. Like a machine, your mind needs fuel of things that motivate you, the fuel determines your destination. Your relationship with your creator & creations feed the virtual reality in your imagination till it emerges with the real world becoming alive. Recreate yourself, your thoughts are either waste of or recycled from fuel & every system needs updating. After believing is achieving. Balance: expand your small self being the better self aiming for the higher self; the piece of God then connect with the universe feeling its energy feeding your inner energy believing in law of attraction, Allah says “I am how my slave thinks that I am, and I am with him if he remembers Me…” Be present to live the present then give back believing in law of karma, Allah also says “If ye are grateful, I will add more (favours) unto you…” – Hanoof Alajmi

Just a thought in the universe

Every piece of the puzzle exists for a reason. Even Chaos is ordered in a detailed order.

Reason and order are the complete opposite of us and that is why we think that life does not make sense.

Our existence is understood in reverse, we were dead before being alive and we live twice not once.

Collecting thoughts is impossible! Without the missing piece we would not have a reason to live and if we found order … then it’s time to go.

A little exercise to make you feel better because you are special and you are worth it

Loving your creator, then loving your existence and knowing the purpose of life is the key to loving yourself.

Energy is all around us in this expanding universe that is full of hopes, dreams and stars for you to look up to.

Beauty is the beautiful nature of your soul, clarity is the pure thoughts that you shower under to have the most pure and golden light around you.

Close your eyes

Imagine having a perfect glow with no gaps

Focus on making it stronger and more golden

This light is the light of your light spirit and it is healing

Breathe in the clean air into your lungs from your nose

Exhale the bad energy and thoughts out as smoke from your mouth

You are a red glowing flower and your time to blossom has come

Imagine this flower opening up slowly and getting brighter

This flower will never die and your glow will never dull, you are beautiful my dear precious soul ❤

A translation from Abdullah al Herz – If you plant seeds of corn and the seeds of a poisonous plant, the ground will make them both grow as you water them day by day. When the time comes to gather what you planted you will get what you gave and the ground does not care if it was poisonous seeds for they will grow anyway. The ground is your mind and you feed it with the thoughts that you put in. You become what you think. Hire guardians to protect the gates of your mind, to allow in the good thoughts and keep out the bad ones.

I imagine my mind as a White Castle with a beautiful heaven inside, workers pull out black plants to throw them away then take care of the beautiful flowers by watering them with love and grow more of what is good. My guardians are beautiful angels who always protect me from every bad thing in the world … They are here for me to comfort me, to love me and heal my light then remind me to pray for Allah who always has good plans for me and answers my prayers and looks out for me.

Fragile thoughts …

In a corner curled up pulling my legs up to my chest … Trying to put myself together. In a breakpoint I am … Helpless and cold. My heart is squeezing my tears out and my chest is full of silent screams to not wake anyone up or because of my sore throat.

I have the urge to change my body, change my identity, change my country, the people and start all over again. I crave a white background so badly instead of this mess which I hate being in. I’m confused and fearful of things that are considered to be shameful.

Suffocated with fire burning inside I think … Will I be alone forever? Will this suffering ever end? I feel ignorant, frustrated and angry. I cover my mirrors, I avoid the truth. I am surrounded by ignorant people who pull me down instead of up. Even if I was blessed to have wings, where would I go to? To whom? Nowhere, nobody.

I fear the light because I was taught that it is wrong. I stay in the darkness because it is all that I’m used to know. What is it like to love yourself and accept it? Will I ever know? I have trophies, certificates but they make me feel bitter not better. I feel less in ever way.

I feel hate and apathy raising in me and growing like death flowers or evil children. Nothing means anything and nothing makes sense. I can’t I won’t …. Will I? I want to live but I am blind … How can I break free? Will I ever? … I can’t sleep and I don’t know how to go out.

I don’t have any value in my life because I live in a tomb. I never had Yeses in my childhood. It was always No, don’t, slaps, wrong, sit still, study, obey. I grew up in the shadows as expected and said No to all of the chances because failure was no option.

Why won’t you let me be me? Why am I wrong in every way? Why am I me? Why can’t I be let free? Why can’t I escape? Why am I here? Why can’t I choose? Why must I live? Why are these people contradicted? Why am I not worthy to be loved? Will I ever find the solution? Will I ever be lucky to take the journey? …

Maybe it is salivation in the way to numb my stings with a small tickle on my wrists or a gentle rope on my neck and a simple snap. Maybe I can walk it off with a run to the cliff and a jump that will be my first and last attempt to feel alive. I am in a grave anyway and this time food, sleep or redecorating won’t fix it.

“Where am I going? Where have I been?” Always gets to me …
I’m going to bed and I hope that I don’t wake up tomorrow because I have nothing waiting for me … I hope that I go to heaven in the end for going through hell once is enough.

I’m not sorry for everyone whom I have ever disappointed because I know that I can’t live up to your high standards. What doesn’t kill you doesn’t make you stronger and life doesn’t smile back. My lack of things is because of my leak and it is a scar that I have to live with. For all of you who want something from me, I don’t have it.

On the edge

Hello blue eyes … I haven’t seen you in a while. Last time I lacked the faith and courage, but I’m a whole new girl now. I grew up but I see that you haven’t changed, you have the same pure soothing depth that you had before.

I trust you with all of my secrets and burdens even though your only response is a comforting whisper, your calming smell and your trials of carrying them far away to the sunset. I feel you flow in life, I feel you break and merge and I hear you call my name every night.

I love the way your smooth fingers play on my face like the playful breeze and I love the buried stories in your treasure chest that you tell me. Take me in when I fall into your mysterious arms, embrace me with your weakness and your strength. Heal my wounds and wash my soul from my stains as I breathe you all in.

I have the need to dip into the darkness and disappear like the mermaid’s story in reverse. I want to float, to dream, to be free, to be saved, to live and to sleep. I’m just a step away … One more step to go beyond, to you, for my rebirth to begin.

*squelch*

The fear of truth

What if you find a book that has all of the answers that you don’t want to know? Would you dare to read? What if then the way you see the world changes? Will you start to see people changing their skins? Will you see your chains which are made of humiliation?

Will you be inside a cage and its key is with a master of your fears? Will you even try to break free? A slave you are, a slave you will be when it falls into the hand of another slave for it is his only chance to switch. Will your blanket shrink then and stop covering your cold feet?

Never mind, you know what is scarier? If the answers were for Yes or No questions and all of them were Yeses. Now, after you read, a mighty door will open before you and strong white light comes out, will you go in or do you fear the light now?

Mysterious man

image

“Am I next?” I thought as I walked by a cemetry in Turkey. They were people like me, I am no god. Will I die? That is out of question. What about my pitiful misdeeds … will I carry their heavy weight on my chest? Will they fit in my grave? In the darkness lays green. Who is that man standing before me? Why do I feel pulled and submissive?

Fear of death is suddenly clear and planted. Stranger, Are you reading my thoughts?! Stop shuffling them on your poker table. I am only grey fading to white. As the healing illness runs through my veins I can hear his only loud thought – “You are next.”